Parenting is a bliss that comes with a cost though. Life takes a 360 degree turn when this new phase starts. Many first-time parents find it intriguing to take care of newborn babies and see them grow into individuals. In the course of the kids’ growth, there are phases when the parents start feeling doing less. Whenever there is a disease hitting the kid or poor performance in class or change in social activities of the child, parents tend to ask –‘How can I improve my parenting skills?’
Good things first. You all are doing great as regards being effective parents if you are doing certain things such as inculcating good habits in the child, playing with them, giving them love, care, and concern unconditionally. Even these basic things demand a lot. These things become tougher to do especially when you are a working parent. And thus, the other side of the coin is – there is always a scope for improvement when it comes to parenting skills.
How can I improve my parenting skills without sounding too obvious?
There is nothing wrong or right or less or more when it comes to taking care of kids. Every kid is different and so are their requirements. When you have understood your child’s behaviors like fussing over the food, worrying about the grades in exams or avoiding meeting certain people, you already have learned a lot about parenting. The other things you can try to improve the parenting skills are:
1) Spending more time with the kids
Good parenting is not only about feeding the kids on time or sending them school on time or getting them to work to meet deadlines. It is a lot more than that. The kids need to gel. They need you to spend time with them. You will come to know a lot of newer things about the child when you include the sharing time and space in your parenting style. This can tell you about their aspirations, their insecurities, and also their strengths. Positive parenting does involve spending a lot of time, but while setting the limits. This indicates a corrective measure to take, which is – setting limits.
2) Setting the limits when and where required
Kids do need to learn to accept rejection. It helps them in keeping mental problems at bay. The kids who are given everything they want instantly find it difficult to understand when someone rejects them something. They start showing aggression and sometimes take it on the heart too. Thus, set the limits in terms of playing time, set reasonable benchmarks for study goals, set the limit under which they should behave with elders, etc. The tone has to be assertive and not aggressive while doing so. I fact, you can adopt a participating approach while setting limits.
3) Try to be a role model without overdoing it
Kids need someone to look up to for learning various things since everything is new to them. Who could be a good role model other than the parents? Rightly said, parents are the first school of the kids. So, practice what you preach to your children. Being a role model means:
- Handling people patiently
- Requesting something when needed
- Using good words always
- Not misusing the power that comes with the position of being a parent
- Treating elders nicely
- Not bullying the kids
If you are a bullying parent, kids will either enclose themselves in their shell or will vent out their frustration on someone who they can bully. Thus, being a good parent can require leaving bad habits and becoming more responsible for the actions as well as thoughts.
4) Talk often, talk more
Effective parenting becomes possible when there is clear and constant communication with the children. As a parent, you need to devote some time to actively listen and to talk to the child. Communication should not have you at the listening end only. In fact, you should also talk more. When you talk, you are actually making them feel important and responsible. So, if there is any tough situation or home, or some kind of mental stress you are dealing with, you must try to talk about it in an understandable manner. Good parenting is not only about shielding the kids from the realities of life. When you are sharing the concerns and also talking about the solutions you are thinking about, it looks like a manageable thing. This makes the kids more prepared for the instances in the long run.
5) Be participating rather than dictating
The parenting strategies should not be dictating always. Children can learn things more easily when they have something to follow. So, participate in activities like time management, schedule maintenance, play activities, and also sleeping and waking up on time. By seeing you doing things expected from them, they do not find anything strange about it and accept it as a normal routine of a day. Spending quality time with the children is another form of participating in a child’s day.
Everybody wants their children to be adorable, sociable, happy and confident. Those children born with special abilities need parents with more sorted thinking and understanding nature. The mental health of children depends upon the kind of atmosphere they find at home and surroundings. So, try to make it as nurturing as possible.
Though there are various parenting styles, adopting them pointwise is not a feasible idea; it rather leaves parents more stressed out. Instead, spending time with kids, playing with them, sharing the joys and sorrows are some of the crucial requirements of being a lovable parent. Including all these things can help in improving parenting skills.